A Belated Happy Non-Denominational Seasonal Holiday

To all those who send me pictures of their babies on some mall Santa's lap... I wish you a merry Kwanzaa and a prosperous New Year.

COLOURS

I was just about to give up on blogging completely, but then today I heard on the CBC that Mahmoud Ahmadinejad* himself has a Blog, so I decided I better get with the picture.

As you can see by the title, today's subject is COLOURS. Now I'm not talking about the 1988 movie directed by Dennis Hopper, starring Sean Penn (although it is a good film, and it launched Penn's career as a serious actor...lucky SOB been married to both Madonna and Robin Wright). I'm talking about paint.

For days now I've been awash in colour (and washing colour out of my hair, and off my arms). Actually, that's a lie. For the last week I've been painting the ceiling and primming the walls of Kiras office upstairs, it's only been today that I broke out the coloured paint. Regardless, it is my duty to tell you all about the beauty and joy of colour. This is dedicated to a certain someone (who shall remain namelless) who has resided in a house entirely painted in shades of pastel peach for over a decade ( love you Mom).

Kira decided that she wanted a nice comfy place to do work while she is at home, so we set up a wireless computer network, and installed her office in the upstairs spare bedroom (hey, how many spare bedrooms do you need?). She was unhappy with the colour of the room (which is a horrible pale yellow on both walls and ceiling), so we went to the paint store to pick a colour.
Known for our conservative colour schemes, we decided on a charming shade of orange called " Chinatown Orange". You will find this baby next to a colour called "fireworks". "Fireworks", is on the conservative side of the colour spectrum in this instance.

Now my house is starting to look like we hire a Mexican interior decorator, but we like it that way. The clash with the dark deep blue bathroom across the hall is amazing. Latin Americans do great things with colour (note that Latin Americans does not mean Americans of Latin descent...Latin Americans are called Hispanics or Latinos in the States WTF!!!). This is probably because the misery of being third world citizens is overwhelming (or they're party people), it could go either way.

Anyway, the gist of my jabber, is that despite how you tint it, a gallon of premium interior latex costs $36.99 at Colour Your world...no matter if you walk out with "Phase Two Taupe" or "Fire Freaking Engine Red". FYI, taupe is not a colour! Have you ever seen taupe on the colour wheel???

Painting is at times frustrating. It's the edges that get you down. A standard room has 4 walls and a ceiling. Kira's office has no less than 13 walls and 5 separate ceilings. Thats a lot of edge.
But painting has its upsides:
1) you can dress like a bum and not change your clothes for a week (what's the point!).
2) a $36.99 gallon of paint lasts a long time...this is cheap entertainment for the unemployed.
3) it gives you a reason to turn the heat on in at least one room in the house.





















By the way...thats only the first coat.






* President of Iran, next guy we will be bombing!!!

Swimming with the Bean

So you have some extra cash on hand...What do you do with it??? Of course, an indoor swimming pool for dogs...why not!!!
Stranger things exist, but for now, let's focus on the VITAL K9 POOL...a swimming pool for dogs. It's true, it exists, I'm a patron.

For $4 you can go to your local rec centre and have a swim and a sauna. For only $28, you can take your dog to the pool.

Okay, it's a little exorbitant for a half hour swim, but in the cause of pet rehabilitation (especially after a $2700 surgery), it seems reasonable. After all, they provide what is the Islands only dedicated dog only, heated, indoor, swimming pool. Not only that, but you actually hire someone to swim with your dog. It's therapy...in a heated pool.

The year round temperature of the Vital K9 Pool is a balmy 27 degrees centigrade...which is pretty plush....especially for a dog.

The interesting part is that most of the clientele is not involved in a round of crucial physiotherapy...most of the clients are just spoiling their beasts by brining them to this climate controlled oasis...year round.
Mark my words, if Sasha had heart her leg in the summer, therapy would be taking place in the lake!!!
Never the less, I now find myself booking swim time at the pool. They've got toys, they've got life jackets (mandatory on the first visit), and they've got love for your dog.
They also do parties.
Does it get any sweeter???

Remembering

Remembering...a good day for it I guess.
Not that I'm remembering dead soldiers. I don't know any, so that makes it difficult.
Not to piss anyone off, but seeing as how the "war to end all wars" proved not to, and seeing as how one of the biggest historical outcomes of WW2 was the rise of the USA as a superpower, I don't see a whole lot point in dedicating a day to remembering war..theres no need to remember - it's still happening. Clearly we haven't learned anything from history, and frankly I reject the idea that those earlier wars happened for noble reasons...the sacrifices made were for the same economic and political reasons that wars have always, and still do, occur. When world peace happens, a day to ponder war would be appropriate.
Some people tell me that without the brave sacrifices of those boys, I'd be living under Hitlers Third Reich. This seems somewhat unlikely,although arguably Europe may be a different place . Gerry never really had a beef with Canada, until we started shooting at him in Europe.
I suppose its the portrayal of these great wars in Europe as being such noble fights that bugs me the most. It really shows up the Eurocentric world we still live in. After all, do the Japanese Canadians who lived in internment camps pause for a minute to remember the fallen Canadians in Europe. Also, the assertion that WW2 was the single largest loss of Canadian life probably doesn't ring true in most first nation communities, they'd probably go with the introduction of small pox.
That being said, Remembrance Day, beyond being a statutory holiday, has made some impacts on my memory. Despite having no poppy on my lapel (or no lapel for that matter), if some veteran put me to the test, I could rattle of "In Flanders Fields" flawlessly. It is the only poem I know verbatim...I have been trained to write it, with all the punctuation in the correct places. I hope that doesn't make me a hopeless patriot.
So instead of dwelling on to much of long ago battles in France and Belgium (two countries who celebrate Armistice Day on this day...with good cause), I spent most of my day cleaning the basement, and sucking spiders up into my shop vacc (sorry sister, but they were over running the place). I also started to paint some of the old wooden walls white, to brighten the place up a bit, and give it the appearance of being cleaner. It occurred to me about halfway through this task that I was the first person to paint this wall. In the 71 years my house has been standing, this wall has remained untouched by colour...unpainted since before Hitler invaded Poland, untouched before the Blitz. There is something meaningful in this somewhere, but even if there isn't, its still a little strange that no one had tried to spruce that one dark corner up in the last 7 decades.















Finally, while outside walking my dog in the pouring November rain, I remembered what my garden looked like last August...not at all like it does today.
Long weekends are better in the summer.

Porno for Pyros

Now I,m not exactly sure why Perry Farrell decided to name his band "Porno for Pyros", but I think it had something to due with the primal lust aroused by a huge pile of waiting willing combustible material.
At a time when thousands of firefighters are battling the blazes fanned by the Santa Anna winds (remember the Alamo?) in Southern California, it seems almost ironic that I wake up in the morning, and get paid to go set large fires in the woods. This is surely the funnest part of my job.
We do it the old fashioned way. No truck mounted flame throwers, or bags of napalm for us. Armed only with a chainsaw, axe, propane torch, and a leaf blower, we set upon these huge piles of wet wood and try to get them to burn. On a sunny, windy day like today, the results are quite pleasing.
For those of you curious about the leaf blower, lets just say that the Santa Anna's ain't nothing compared to the gust that comes out of the business end of a Stihl professional series leaf blower...a tornado in your hands.
Sure, I come home smelling like I've been sitting next to a campfire for a week, with red eyes and soot streaked across my face, but lets face it...it just old fashioned fun.
Is it arson when someone pays you to burn something...not in this case. Think I might go burn some stuff in the backyard...just for fun!!!

Did I Really Pay Some Guy $2600 to Shave My Dogs Butt?

Well, of course I didn't. That would be silly after all. But to the untrained eye....it appears that I might of.
My once bounding dog can not even get up on her comfy couch all by herself...she needs a bit of help these days. That's what happens when you have your Cruciate ligament rebuild with synthetic materials. Seriously...she's partly bionic now. The Six Million Dollar Dog so to speak.
It's kind of weird realizing that you now organize your once independent life around your pet. I now sleep downstairs in the spare room because she can't manage the stairs. I now find myself walking her around the backyard on a leash in the middle of the night, pleading with her to go pee. I now find myself without the means to go on an exciting adventure this winter, and even if I could pool together some dough, I would be busy rehabilitating my dogs left hind leg well into January.
She's a trooper though, and it is amusing to take pictures of her half shaven arse.
Long Live the Bean!!!

More Helpful than Facebook

So you might want to check this out.
Instead of giving money to large charity corporations that really keep most of the money for themselves, you can now lend money to people who need it. Micro financing...its all the rage.
By someone some pigs...if they're asking for money to buy pigs...the probably can really use the pig. Sure, it's possible that they will default on your loan. So then you're out a whole $25. Worth the risk really. Plus...you can give people gift certificates...this is the perfect gift for those who don't really need anything (you know who you are). This will force the person to buy pigs. Excellent.
So check it out: http://www.kiva.org/app.php