Pregnancy, Birth, and Child Rearing in the Digital Age

As you may know, that last of my childless friends are having a baby. This is alarming for a number of reasons, but watching first time parents cope with the experience (from a safely guarded distance, of course) can be amusing and insightful.
One such insight occurred to me today. I dropped my friend Mike (he's the "dad to be" in this particular scenario) off at home today, after work, and was greeted outside on the sidewalk by his partner Kara (the "mom to be")in her stocking feet (funny really, as the last time I saw her she was wearing gum boots but no socks). She was waving a piece of paper with a black and white photo image on it. This was, of course, the first ultra sound photo of the "baby to be".
I looked at the photo, counted the number of visible heads (Mikes brother just had twins...uh... his partner actually), and tried to determine what was what.
"He's about the size of a small mouse" said Kara.
"It" I replied, and received a dismissive smile (sarcasm isn't always appreciated by pregnant hormone laden women), but I feel my point was valid...the sex of the small mouse creature was clearly indeterminate at this stage (at later stages, they black out the naughty bits if you don't want to know...kind of like Hustler magazines from the 1980's).
Anyway, as I was leaving, she asked me if I had a scanner so she could scan the ultra sound and send it to her mom/friends etc..
I don't have a scanner, but this little exchange made me think...Hmmm... it's quite normal to send people pictures of your unborn children these days...in fact... in certain circles it's probably expected.
Mike's brothers twins (actually they are Kama's twins)

This got me thinking about how much the experience of pregnancy has changed in the last couple of decades (since I was a small mouse that is).
First off, it very common to say that couples are pregnant. In fact, I had to correct myself on this point earlier. When I'm talking about said pregnancy, I say that "Mike and Kara are pregnant". Now, looking at Mike, its clear that he is a man, and therefore cannot conceive...but still...the terminology is out there...and pervasive.
The second thing that came to mind was that people are not shy about talking about, or even photographing, or even showing you the photographs/videos of what previously was considered "a very private thing not to be discussed". This is, in a way, a positive thing, as it has allowed the births and public breastfeeding to be re-accepted in society. But it can be taken to far...I mean how many times do you watch the miracle of birth on DVD?? How much does prime time TV have to suck before you switch off a rerun to watch trhat?? Really, the only video/photos I want to see of this whole process are the ones they were taking when they were making the little bugger!
It then occurred to me that kids (after they are born) have a lot of freakin' pictures taken of them. I had a few pictures taken of me when I was small, perhaps 20, but I know of infants that have had their images recored 1000's of times, and in various media formats. Were talking candid snaps, formal portraits, home videos...) And these images get sent all over, to people who really don't care that much, who still put them up on their fridge (seriously, my fridge looks like a still life of a pre-school. I recall one of Kira's friend who ducked out of coming to our wedding. They sent a note after...not one mention of our nuptials, just an envelope with portraits of their kids...one with fake butterfly wings no less. It is really no wonder that so many young people line up for Canadian Idol and other reality TV shows...their prepped for the camera...they've been shaking it in front of the camera since they were born!





















Look...it's me holding a baby...don't I look comfortable (I was probably drunk).

post script: the image at the top of the screen is not Mike and Kara's mouse creature, I simply Googled "ultrasound" and chose this from the 34000000 hits I got. The name of the paitient has been deleted to protect the guilty.