Super Best Friends (the Axis of Stupidity)

I got this cool new program that adds and edits subtext to abstracts of newspaper articles dealing with high profile political issues…check it out.

On Iraq

Bush: The decision to remove Saddam Hussein from power was controversial (and illegal). We did not find the weapons of mass destruction that we all believed were There (the ones that we sold them back in the 1980’s). , and that's raised questions about whether the sacrifice in Iraq has been worth it. Despite setbacks and missteps, I strongly believe we did, and are doing the right thing. Saddam Hussein was a menace to his people; he was a state sponsor of terror; he invaded his neighbors.


Blair: As everyone knows, ….(I have no opinion of my own because I am a puppet on a string).

On the UN

Blair: I think what we need to do is to recognize that there are threats in our world today that require us to act earlier and more effectively. And I think we can debate the institutional structure within which that should happen in the United Nations and elsewhere, but I also think that when we look at this global terrorism that we face, there is - to me, at any rate - a very clear link between the terrorism that is afflicting virtually every country in the western world, either in actuality or potentially, the terrorism that is happening all over different countries
of the Middle East and in Asia and elsewhere, and the terrorism that is there in Iraq and Afghanistan. It's such a huge sacrifice that is being made. Can it be worth it? And I think the answer to that is, it is worth it to those engaged in this violence and terrorism to try to stop us, and we should have the same faith and confidence in our determination to succeed as they have in their determination to make us fail. (This quote needs no alteration, as it is awkward and non-sensical enough on its own)

Bush: I'd like to see a United Nations that's effective, one that joins us in trying to rid the world of tyranny (except our tyranny), one that is willing to advance human rights and human dignity at its core (the way we do when we imprison suspected terrorists without charge or trial, and when we illegally tap peoples phones), one that's an unabashed organization - is unabashed in their desire to spread freedom. That's what I'd like to see, because I believe that freedom will yield to peace. I also believe freedom is universal. I don't believe freedom is just a concept only for America or Great Britain. (and I will bomb the crap out of any country that disagrees) It's a universal concept. And it troubles me to know that there are people locked in tyrannical societies that suffer (except our own, this thought comforts me). And the United Nations ought to be clear about its desire to liberate people from the clutches of tyranny (and not be so concerned about feeding people and stopping genocides). That's what the United Nations ought to be doing, as far as I'm concerned (and that’s what I’m going to tell them to do, or I’ll bomb the crap out of them...I will rain down a mighty flood of friendly fire on those UN terrorist supporting, peace keeping, liberal minded, Canadian types).


On Iran

Bush: We spent a great deal of time talking about the Iranian issue, and one of the goals that Tony and I had was to convince others in the world that Iran, with a nuclear weapon, would be very dangerous, and, therefore, we do have a common goal. And the fundamental question is, how do you achieve that goal, obviously. We want to do it diplomatically (as long as our demands are met and America makes no concessions). To answer your questions, of course, we'll look at all options, but it's their choice right now. They're the folks who walked away from the table. They're the ones who said that, your demands don't mean anything to us (imagine the gall of a country, walking away from, or going against the will of an international body in pursuit of a policy that they feel is the morally correct one in the face of a perceived threat from a heavily armed country with an opposing moral ideology…such a blatant exercise of the desire for freedom sickens me).

Blair: Now, we were just talking about Iran a moment ago. I mean, we want to have this resolved through the process of the multilateral institutions. There's a way we can do this. I mean, after all, we are the ones saying the Atomic Energy Authority, their duties and obligations they lay upon Iran should be adhered to. And we've got absolutely no quarrel with the Iranian people. The Iranian people are a great people; Iran is a great country. But it needs agovernment that is going to recognize that part of being a great country is to be in line with yourinternational obligations, and to (do exactly what George W says…just like I do) cease supporting those people in different parts of the world who want, by terrorism and violence, to disrupt the process of democracy.